Author Topic: Jokes (Read 222225 times)

RedAce · « **Reply #5302 on:** March 25, 2015, 06:54:08 AM »

Found this article, and I found it hilarious:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/alisoncaporimo/never-the-same-again#.jn6RpvbLp

Scrap Daddy · « **Reply #5303 on:** March 25, 2015, 07:55:24 AM »

Quote from: RedAce on March 25, 2015, 06:54:08 AM

Found this article, and I found it hilarious:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/alisoncaporimo/never-the-same-again#.jn6RpvbLp

I just revised one of my roomies resumes, I shoulda slipped in his deep interest in masturbation.

RedAce · « **Reply #5304 on:** March 31, 2015, 10:38:43 AM »

I found Naryar's favorite car:

Jonzu95 · « **Reply #5305 on:** March 31, 2015, 12:14:45 PM »

Quote from: RedAce on March 31, 2015, 10:38:43 AM

I found Naryar's favorite car:

(Image removed from quote.)

>Implying Honda Jazz is the only Hybrid out there.

Naryar · « **Reply #5306 on:** March 31, 2015, 03:01:04 PM »

Quote from: RedAce on March 31, 2015, 10:38:43 AM

I found Naryar's favorite car:

(Image removed from quote.)

Eh, it's green.

Also it needs MORE RAZORS and a flamethrower and probably two other weapon types on there.

But yeah, hybrid electric/combustion engine cars are pretty damn good. And I don't say that just because it's an hybrid car.

RedAce · « **Reply #5307 on:** April 01, 2015, 01:14:06 PM »

Naryar · « **Reply #5308 on:** April 01, 2015, 02:56:21 PM »

Quote from: RedAce on April 01, 2015, 01:14:06 PM

(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)

die

Mr. AS · « **Reply #5309 on:** April 01, 2015, 03:44:02 PM »

I miss BiTF.

HurricaneAndrew · « **Reply #5310 on:** April 01, 2015, 03:52:52 PM »

APRIL FOOLS

Sylandro · « **Reply #5311 on:** April 01, 2015, 06:18:33 PM »

Do you know who's a joke?

Jonzu95 · « **Reply #5312 on:** April 02, 2015, 04:24:32 AM »

Quote from: Sylandro on April 01, 2015, 06:18:33 PM

Do you know who's a joke?

Jonzu and I.

What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that sh** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little sh**. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will sh** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo.

Chaosmancer · « **Reply #5313 on:** April 05, 2015, 06:20:36 AM »

TommyProductionsInc · « **Reply #5314 on:** April 05, 2015, 08:20:27 PM »

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's really time consuming.

HurricaneAndrew · « **Reply #5315 on:** April 05, 2015, 09:40:08 PM »

What's the difference between blacks and Cubans?

Cubans can swim.

yugitom · « **Reply #5316 on:** April 06, 2015, 05:29:23 PM »

Re-visiting Rainbow again has given me some real bad jokes:

When is a door not a door?
When it's ajar!

I saw a baby snake the other day. I knew it was a baby snake 'cos it had a rattle!

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers?
A nervous wreck!

Oh God, I loved these jokes when I was a kid... I love memory lane.

HurricaneAndrew · « **Reply #5317 on:** April 08, 2015, 05:03:10 PM »

A gay black guy walks into a bar in Texas. The bartender says "Get the **** out."

rnifnuf · « **Reply #5318 on:** April 10, 2015, 01:29:45 AM »

If the organization is called Alcoholic's Anonymous, why is it customary to disclose your name?

Why don't prisons hand out multiple bars of soap?

The saying "A picture speaks a million words" is true for a 1000x1000 bitmap.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto ~~Fistfight in Heaven~~ arrive at a tavern in the desert. After tying their horses outside, they go inside and have a few drinks. Suddenly, a cowboy asks the Lone Ranger: "Excuse me, sir, but is that your fine white stallion out there?" The Lone Ranger replies with "Yes, it is." The cowboy replies with: "It looks like it's getting too hot," and he walks away. The Lone Ranger tells Tonto "Hey Tonto, go run around my horse to cool it down." Tonto replies with "Run around horse, cool down," as he goes to carry out the order. Later, another cowboy approaches the Lone Ranger and says: "Excuse me, sir, but is that your fine white stallion out there?" The Lone Ranger replies with "Yes, it is." The cowboy tells him: "You left your Injun runnin'"

Chaosmancer · « **Reply #5319 on:** April 10, 2015, 09:24:39 AM »